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Choose the Topic you would like Al to Address: Choose a Topic Below... Love Sex Pregnancy Loneliness Priorities Too Busy Insecurity Material things Rejection Anger Forgiveness Suicide a Sin Witness God's Will Ministry Satanism Security Death Salvation? I feel suicidal Bad Language Drugs/Alcohol Addiction Gossiping and/or Lying Guilt Trust Smoking or Dipping? Abortion Occult Suffering My parents hate me Rebelling Obedience Sharing Jesus with Parents Divorce Question 7. I'm very insecure and spend most of my time trying to please others. I'm miserable! What should I do? There is only one way a person can truly be secure and have a healthy self-image. How? By having a relationship with Jesus, and understanding who you are in Him. What does that mean? First, it means you must become a Christian. You must be "in" Jesus and Jesus must be "in" you. Second, you must understand what it means to be "in him". Many Christians don't understand what happened to them the moment Christ saved them. The Bible says the moment you took responsibility for your sins and asked Jesus to forgive you, something supernatural happened. The "old you" died and in your place was born a new person. The Bible says this new person has Jesus living in him and this new person is "in Christ" as well. (Read 2 Corinthians 5:17; Galatians 2:20' Colossians 3:3) This "new you" may look like the "old you" on the outside, but on the inside (in your heart) everything is different. All your sins--past, present, and future--are gone, as if they never happened. The Bible says you are holy, pure, and even blameless because of Jesus. Because God accepts Jesus, He accepts you because you are "in" Christ." You give God pleasure. There is nothing you have to do to win His love or acceptance. He put His stamp of approval on you the moment you made a commitment to Christ as Savior and Lord. (Read 1 Corinthians 1:30; Ephesians 1:6) Last year we put down new flooring in our kitchen. It was very expensive, but it looked great! The same day the work was complete, we moved our refrigerator back in place. Even though we were super-careful, we put two huge gashes in the new floor! We were sick! We tried to fix the floor, but we couldn't. So we went to the store and bought one of those country kitchen rugs to cover the cuts. The rug looks fine there and no one would know the floor was marred--but we know. Many Christians think their life is like that floor. They are scarred by sin. The damage can't be repaired. To them, Jesus is like that rug. He just came along and covered their sin problem, so who they really are does not show. The Bible says that Jesus does not just cover our sin--he supernaturally replaces the entire floor. He trades your torn up life for a new, perfect one. There is no need to hide behind a rug or anything else. Do you understand? The new you gives God pleasure. Since He accepts and loves you, you are free to love and accept yourself. The need to please other people to win their approval disappears. You already have God's approval, and that's all that matters! What you think about yourself will determine how you live. If you think of yourself the way God does--pure and blameless--then that is how you will live. But, if you still think of yourself like that scarred kitchen floor--a dirty, rotten sinner who could never change--then that is how you will live. There was a sixteen-year-old girl who started coming to our church several years ago. She had a bad reputation at her school and she earned it! Kathy had had sex with several boys. When she came to us, she was a mess. She listened to the claims of Christ and received Him as her Savior. Kathy was baptized and wanted to live for Jesus. She wanted to forget her past, but the kids at school would not let her. She was struggling. One night I sat down with her at the place where she was working during her break. "Kathy", I said, "do you understand that when God looks at you now, he does not see Kathy, "the tramp". He doesn't see Kathy with all those guys. When God looks at you now, he sees Kathy, a virgin, dressed in white, pure and clean." It was as if a light bulb clicked on and a peace came to her. She just burst into tears. All she could say was, "Thank you Jesus, thank you Jesus." From that day on, it did not matter what others said. Kathy knew who she was in Christ and she was free to serve the God who set her free. She understood that because she was completely forgiven, she could forgive herself. Right before the Civil War there was a godly man who lived in the south but hated slavery. He refused to own another human being. One day while he was in town, he noticed a slave auction going on. The man was usually sickened by the sight of these and stayed away, but that day something caught his eye. A family--husband, wife and young child--were about to be auctioned separately, never to see each other again. Their grief cut him like a knife. The man made his way to the front of the crowd just as the bidding started. He did something he had never done before--he bid first on the young husband and father, then on the wife and mother, then on the child. He had to pay a huge sum of money, but he won all three. The little family was so overwhelmed when they realized that they were going to get to stay together, they sobbed for joy. The man paid his money and picked up the ownership papers. He walked over to where the three stood waiting in their chains. This man then ordered the chains removed and handed the papers to the astonished family. "Here", he told them, "I purchased you to set you free." These ex-slaves fell at his feet and said, "Master, we will serve you forever!" They did this not because they had to, but out of an overwhelming sense of gratitude. They would gladly serve the one who purchased them and bought their freedom. When you understand what Christ did for you, you'll also want to serve the one who purchased your freedom. 2 CORINTHIANS 5:17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! GALATIANS 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. COLOSSIANS 3:3 For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. 1 CORINTHIANS 1:30 It is because of him that your are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God-that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. Therefore, as it is written: "Let him who boasts boast in the Lord"